Have you ever heard the old saying
It takes a village to raise a child.
To me, that quote means that raising children is not an easy task, it takes more than one person to raise a child. To raise a child, you need to be prepared mentally, physically, and most importantly, financially! Having a supportive village could definitely ease the stresses of parenthood that you may encounter.
If you’re a single parent with absolutey no help, I really appreciate you. Being a parent is one of the hardest jobs in the world! So for you to do it all by yourself, that’s really special. It is extremely amazing.
When I say no help, I mean that you are NOT receiving any form of help from the other parent, your family, the other parents’ family, etc.
Anyway, let’s chat more on this topic:
The younger your child is, the more help you would need. Diapers, wipes, and formula could really wipe out your pockets. You can spend up to $150 on those three items alone, per month. Buying in bulk of course. However formula, formula is expensive. You can end up spending $30-$60 on one can of formula.
Thankfully we have government funded programs like W.I.C. W.I.C is a special supplemental nutrition program for Women, Infants, and Children. This program can help assist families in need of purchasing formula and baby food for your little ones. You can apply for W.I.C by clicking here!
If you do not have a village supporting you, then that can make things very difficult. The village is not really a village. In simpler words, it is a support system, a group of individuals who assist you with raising and providing for your child(ren).
However, if you do have a village supporting you, then that is just great!
Let’s discuss the benefits of having a village supporting you:
- Financial Assistance: In many cases, you do not have to break your budget or pockets when you have a village supporting you. They may even ask you if you and the kids need anything so that you won’t have to spend all of your money.
- Mental help: The village could help you mentally, meaning help relieve your stress. This could be by having a simple chat with you to make sure that you’re mentally fit and capable to cope with the stress of raising your child(ren). Nothing is better than chatting with an individual who you can relate to, talking with a person who has been in your shoes before.
- Physically There: Since there are a lot of people who cannot always provide financial help, people who are considered the village, would definitely be there for you. They can help you out by baby sitting your child(ren) so you can run errands, cook a meal, interact with the rest of the world. The options are endless.
- Correct Mistakes: Most people who are part of the village would help you correct your mistakes. Parenting mistakes, that is. Simply by giving helpful suggestions, tips, or even showing you how to do something the proper way.
- Memory Refresher: Let’s be real, since parenting is stressful, you will most likely forget a lot of things since you’re running after your child(ren) 24/7. The village will remind you of upcoming important things such as doctors appointments, due dates (if you’re in school), etc.
The village is supposed to be extremely helpful and judgement free, mainly due to the fact that most members of the village are also parents who have been in the same situation as you.
Now that we’ve discussed how a village could assist you, let’s discuss what a village is NOT.
What A Village Is NOT:
- Judgmental: Members of the village should not be judgmental. They should not judge you and your parenting techniques. They should help you and not bash you in anyway.
- Spiteful: Members of the village should not be spiteful. When I say spiteful, I mean like offering you help if they see you in need and rubbing it in your face constantly. Trying to make it seem like they helped you because you asked, when in all reality, you have never asked or expected help from them.
- People who make you feel bad: Members of the village should not make you feel bad about needing help. Everyone needs help every now and then, it is perfectly normal to need help. They should not make you feel any less about yourself because you’re struggling.
Imagine laughing at someone who is struggling and in need of help, then BOOM, you end up in the exact situation that you laughed at. You know what’s that called, it’s called KARMA!
If you know someone that has kids and is struggling, please try your best to help them. Yes, as a parent we are well aware that we have made the adult decision to lay down and make a baby. However, that does not give anyone the right to deny anyone of help.
We all need help every now and then, so it’s best to step up and assist others when they’re in need. In a better sense, think about what if you had a child and was struggling, wouldn’t you want someone to help you?
Thanks for reading!